This is what usually happens when my parents come to visit me in Subang. This is what it is all about. Making sure that the house is clean. In fact this is what my mom would probably talk about, if we're lucky to have passed her incredibly high standards in cleanliness. And she'll probably ask whether I got do house chores or not on time, check on me and my sister, and check whether our 'statements' tally to each other. My dad would probably be watching TV, pretending to be oblivious to my mom's ongoing inquisition.
This is how my family functions daily.
Pretty horrible to be honest. A total failure if you ask my opinion. Ask me whether I love my family I will say yes, but not before a slight moment of hesitation. How do you forgive or forget when words as sharp as knives have been traded between us down the years? I'm not going to go into details regarding the fights I've had with my mom and dad (mom more), because if I do that i'm going to need a book to write it all down. But to give you a rough idea, we fought plenty of times down the years. Literally.
My friends always ask me why is my mother so strict on me? I don't know to be honest. I think its her way of comforting herself that she has control over me perhaps? Or maybe she thinks that by being strict she's fulfilling her obligations to my dad. Yes, she thinks taking care of us is an obligation to my father. Never failed to mention it to my face whenever we fight either. For those of you who don't know about my history, she's my stepmother. My real mother passed away when I was 3, and my dad remarried. While she never tortured me, abuse me or do anything to harm me, she wasn't the perfect mother either. She makes sure that I'm well-fed and well taken care of, but that is all that she does in those days. A babysitter who make sure that I do my homework, brush my teeth, eat my veggie and drink enough water each day.
While my mom (stepmom) make sure that I always toe the line, sad to say my dad was rarely to be seen. If he wasn't working late he'd be having dinner with his clients/friends. Or he'd be drinking in pubs. Back in those days I was terrified of my mom. Yes she was really scary until I grew a pair and start fighting back. Needless to say all those emotional support or close conversation or intimate moments never happened between me and my parents. My dad was literally not there while my mother was never there for me emotionally. In fact I'm afraid to open up in case whatever I tell her she'll take it and use it against me. The things I get into trouble are so unlike the rest of my friends. For example, my friend would be reprimanded for not performing well in school exam. Me? I was a top student in my high school and I was being scolded for things not related to studies at all. For example, I went to my parents' friend's open house on CNY. Parties like these are usually boring and that party was no different. But I met this pretty girl from my school and we chatted for quite a long time. I really liked her a lot and we talked and laughed like we've known each other for years. After she went home, my mom came and cornered me. Incredibly, she start scolding me about why I can talk and laugh with a girl from my school with such ease but can't talk like that to her. Needless to say we got into a fight after we went home, all over a chat I enjoyed with a girl from my school. My dad didn't really stood up for me either.
Parents are responsible for the way their children grow up and in my case it is the same. This fractious relationship that I share with my parents are the direct consequences of the errors and the neglect that they have displayed during my upbringing. I'm not saying I don't love you guys or I'm not coming back home when I graduate. All I'm saying is that all this mess, you only have yourselves to blame.
